Friday, August 26, 2011

Heavenly Host

Wants to spread your fire

drench every cell in oil for you

wash the tension from your muscles

and thoughts

wants to pour you over every cushion

and landscape

flood their vision with your abundance

and beauty

wants to hold you

in the safety of his magic

wants to crash their buildings

and monuments with wave

wants a bisexual slave

a hard amber grave

where he might

be displayed

observed

like some

prehistoric insect

trapped in time

and place

wants children to dance for

and kiss you

flowers

showers

spring growth

a brighter green

wants more strength in the seam

than the fabric itself

has a tendency to rip apart

to peel off

to scratch away

wants the glue to never dissolve

wants everything to assist

and accommodate you

currency to spend itself on you

duck fat

silk

and gold

wants vitamins and minerals

to nourish you

along with television

sex

and drugs

wants the mirror to wink back at you

smile blush

feel giddy around you

wants sensual feelings to pulse through you

your electric skin

to stand hairs on end

wants young lovers to astound you

surround you with wit and

clever narcissism

running away from home

and two dollar solipsism

wants a fine selection

of meats

to be hung

in your smokehouse

wants to delouse your body

with the hungry tongues

of mute lovers

who know only

your pleasure

Monday, August 22, 2011

Orange Buick

Not keeping strict records makes the mice fat. My grandfather used to keep small notebooks in his shirt pocket and at the return of every car trip would write down the mileage of the vehicle and brief description of various destinations – grocer, p.o. (for post office), gas, Michael – I would watch him intently and wondered if I was a destination or a passenger. Late at night I snuck into the basement and found an old box filled with these small notebooks. The box was labeled Orange Buick 1982 -1992. I flipped through the small spiral notebooks tattooed heavily with blue ink pressed deliberately into the page. I found other names and noted that that must mean passenger.

My mother’s father was a colonel in the U.S. Army and a stickler for values – an agent of morals, a Gideon in retirement – a warrior – for god, country and family – Ronald Reagan and The Republican Party – all that which has been taught as holy – unquestioning the very fabric of the foundation – a pupil, a soldier, a cog in the machine… An intelligent and loving man who did not stray from his moral path… boring, spending the last three decades watching sports on television… good little boy… adopted by his grandfather, a strict disciplinarian in a home without electricity or plumbing. Imagine that, growing up in a building without electricity or plumbing… I suppose most of the world lives in those very conditions today – but you got to go back pretty far to find that the norm in the United States. Outhouse full of shit, candles conserved in the winter and dark nights with the unconscious…

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Arboretum Mojo

We made a potent tea out of the psilocybin mushrooms. Travis bought an ounce of the drug and boiled it in four cups of water. I had never seen this done before; neither had Floyd. I don’t think Travis had either, but he was young: nineteen. Sometimes it is best to bluff your way to knowledge.

Floyd drove a 1985 Jeep wrangler. I rode in the back. We drank the tea, swallowing large chunks of the stuff as we turned the thermos up to the air for our share of the potion.

The road cut into the mountain, winding around the girth and up the incline. The sun was warm yellow and summertime. The sky was blue azure and crystal pure. The wind was gentle and the clouds were huge. This was BIG SKY territory – Olympus to the bear gods, high altitude; land of the shining mountains – as states go: fourth in square footage but forty-fourth in population.

Diamond penumbra supernovas imploded and exploded like dragons breathing. Techno-color music invaded by dullness. Magical beings began laughing and vibrating in the greenery. Fairies whispered scintillate kisses from unknown heavens. “I’m taking off man!” I shouted from the back of the cab.

Travis turned around to look at me. His mouth and eyes opened wider and wider, until I thought he might lose his face to the full expression. I wasn’t sure how much more whites of his eyes he could expose – how much farther apart his lips could stretch. I half expected him to unhinge his jaw and swallow himself in reverse, devour himself into nothingness. He laughed.

I realized my position. I had my feet and arms stretched out in such a manor that I wasn’t sitting down or standing up, but leaning over as if I was flying. My feet were wedged against the rear bars of the jeep somehow and I held onto an overhead beam. My memory of this position is not very clear to me, but I remember feeling that I was driving the machine with my psychic force. (Sometimes there is more truth in the sentiment than the fact.) While driving the jeep with my mind I made us go off road. The jolt from tarmac to dirt kicked me from my position. I fell into a lucky back seat.

“We’re here.” Floyd said as he got out of the truck.

There was no road before the one we had just made. The jeep could physically go no further. This was our cue to begin our journey in the forest on foot.

Travis gave us each a small leather pouch, the entirety of which could easily be hidden in your fist. “Mojo bags: While we’re out here – if you find something special, collect it. I’m going to wear mine around my neck.”

“What the hell is a mojo bag?” Floyd wanted to know.

I didn’t. I got it. I headed for the thick growth of the Bridger Mountains. I spotted a dying pine that was crisp and fragile and white with brown, like a disease or a curse. The limbs curled in on itself. The circular edges rested on the ground or curled stiff towards the trunk.

“A wizard tree!” Travis said after me.

Everything was symmetrical. The tree flickered a sizzling blue mist. I went to the center of the tree and stared out. Everything seemed different. I felt like Jonah in the belly of a cosmic spirit awaiting god’s communication.

I looked down. There was a tiny orange mushroom that glowed neon tangerine. I picked it and placed it in my mojo bag.

I believed this to be a very serious task now. I was to make some sort of secret concoction to serve as protection and good magic for me and my travels, my adventures. I understood. Beside the mushrooms I saw a tiny turd; as if a shy squirrel came here to shit in his own little john. I put the rodent waste in my bag as well, for the nitrogen. I wanted my bag to be explosive. I felt that tree corpse still vibrating and humming with some strange new energy that tingled and titillated my fingerprints. I broke off a piece of the trunk’s bark and bit into it. Why? Because I was high as hell on drugs. Anyway I spit out the bitter skin into my hand and placed the saliva soaked chunk of bark into my secret bag of tricks.

I found shiny glittery rocks, mica flakes and pyrite, mixed with soil and the shell of a robin’s egg. I inserted dead insects and rubies into the bag, snake skin and a mouse skull I found in a pile of owl shit. I picked leaves from rare bushes, rare wild herbs that only the shaman of The Blackfeet and The Crow know about, with weird psychotropic healing properties.

I collected the brittle wings of a dragonfly, and for a while I was on a kick where I would blow all of the dandelion seeds from the shaft in one breath and expect my wish to come true, meanwhile running ahead and catching the blown seeds in my little mojo bag. The bag was becoming pretty hefty with my magical efforts.

The three of us walked and walked in no particular direction away from our origin and in no straight line. It was early afternoon, and we found time to lie in a field of tall grass and let the wind bend the stalks, have the silk tickle us. We laughed and we laughed…

I could see and I could hear the cosmic dynamo vibrate and hum. I rested in a field of golden wheat, on my back, which was the surface of the earth. I felt my body was THE body of Christ, THE body of earth, THE body of man, THE body of god, warm and pulsing blood and cells and genetic material, heaven, hell and dream. I opened up all of my sensors and realized the infinity.

I let the wind tickle my neurons, my leg hairs, my eyelashes, the cilia in my nostrils, the dry chapped skin of my lip. My hair became golden wheat and blew with the wind. It was a fascinating blend of me versus the universe becoming one with the universe in a perverse magic spell of time and place.

You have to be brave when you’re young; that’s what matters most. You have to give yourself over to the adventure or you will grow stale and have no fun stories to tell.

I got up first from the breezy tickle-flight and found my way over to the little stream that trickled nearby where Zen toads croaked in silence. I smoked a cigarette and marveled at the demons and novas that swirled and whirled around in my hazy exhale.

I flicked cigarette ashes into my mojo bag – a combination of reverence and disgust is always needed. I wanted as much cacca as jewel, as much shit as brilliance – as much nitrogen as oxide. I wanted to swirl together the strongest forces from every small quadrant on the marble. I wanted crystal and skull, excrement and egg shell, bark and saliva, blood and oil. I felt like I had a pretty good grasp on this whole mojo bag thing.

I leaned against a giant Ponderosa Pine and inhaled the tree’s sweet piney flavor. The aroma was almost too much to bear. My lungs full of the fragrance, I coughed and spit out perfume rich saliva. I closed my eyes again. Now used to the smell I felt the fantastic tree with two open palms; the course bark, dark orange and black, like cracked terra firma, leather skin.

A strange music emitted from that Blackjack Pine; a creaking, a squeaking music like wet vertebrae cracking, or the popping ancient arthritic ghost-knuckles of Ramses II. It sounded as if the trees were stretching with a song. I could hear the water being sucked up through the roots of the trees. Thirsty cells were popping inside the tree rhythmically; POPpopPoPpOPpoP went the enormous tree’s trunk. The sound was like elves drumming a wild routine on the imaginary bongos of beatnik ghosts. POPpopPoPpOPpoP continued the gigantic tree.

With my eyes closed I continued to listen to that enormous Western Yellow Pine’s internal cellular structure burst in tones and music. When I opened my eyes I looked at my hands and found that they were covered in insects travelling north from the floor of the earth to the sky of evergreen needles, two hundred feet in the air. My hands were of no concern to the bizarre caterpillars and ants and beetles and whatever other insects thirsty, all eager for the sap of that great tree, scurrying and climbing over the warm barriers.

I wondered if that was a hallucination, as I have tripped pretty hard on bugs before. Whatever the truth was, it was a neat sight. That very tall Rocky Mountain Pine sprouted from the ground like an enormous missile silo, surrounded by many more of its kind; seed dropper, natural bloomer, strong bodied survivor, and each of the trees were singing; POPpopPoPpOPpoPing their bursting cellular orgasm.

The insects were here for the sap, the sweet excretions given by the Bull Pine’s xylem and phloem cells, previously creaking and POPpopPoPpOPpoPing and ringing out to the insect population that it is time to feed their hungry little bellies with the sticky ooze.

Soon the birds came. They must have heard the music of the trees, knowing the hunger of the insects. They swarmed like clouds and descended upon the trees like the hungry winged beasts they were. The birds ate the caterpillars, the ants, the beetles and whatever that creepy stick looking thing is called.

It was an orgy of music and feeding. The trees were being cleansed of their artery build-up. The insects were getting sugar buzzes and filling the bellies of the wrens, meadowlarks and cardinals with their easy meal. Powerful raptors circled above the enormous pines, ready for the freshly fattened birds to flutter from the treetops and into their talons.

The earth gave to the sky in this fashion. It planted seeds in itself and grew very tall. The next step was to draw in water and grow even taller; next bait the insects with creaking xylem cells that issue forth the sap. Now trading its scales for feathers and evolving for flight, a bird is called to feast on the feasting insects, and finally the high flying raptors are attracted to the scene for the arboretum feasting.

Beneath the trees, hunters waited patiently with high powered rifles that pierced the bodies of these magnificent hunters and brought the sky back down to the ground.

KABOOM! KABOOM! Shotgun blasts scattered the birds and the mind.

I was lost in the woods, high as hell on psychedelic mushrooms with two of my friends and no idea the source of the gunshots.

KABOOM! KABOOM! The fairies and dragons became quiet and invisible again. It was time to focus and assimilate the scene with the dream. Where we being hunted? Was it possible that we were targets? KABOOM! KABOOM! We hunkered down and decided to smoke a cigarette and maybe calm down and maybe isolate the direction of those shots. KABOOM! KABOM!

“Look man I don’t know what is going on – but uh – I say we try to find a way out of here” I was ready to move – I wanted to challenge this challenge and find a way out of the confusing maze.

“OK,” Floyd was in.

Travis nodded his frightened rabbit head up and down.

KABOOM! KABOM! I looked around to see what was what. We were in a basin that as far as I could tell held no threat in its bowl. We were high up on one ridge of the mountain. “I suggest we hike close to that ridge and listen for the gunshot source, maybe they’re just hunters.” KABOOM!

“Oh they’re definitely hunters! I just hope they’re not drunk and ready to shoot anything big.” Travis was worried, “Hey does anyone know where we are – like where the truck is or anything?” His buck teeth bit his bottom lip and his eyes were big with worry and fear.

KABOOM! KABOM! I looked at Floyd and could tell by his blank expression and aimless looking around that we were supremely lost.

We ran with our backs bent over, like we had seen soldiers do in the movies or perhaps just instinctively, as if we had weapons and could possibly engage the enemy in combat. We ran until we were certain we were running away from the gunfire. We all squatted by a tree and decided upon another plan. I decided to lie on my stomach and crawl over the ridge to see what I could see.

KABOOM! KABOM! Travis and Floyd stared at me with blank expressions. I didn’t wait for a reply. I crawled on my stomach over the crest. I inched myself slowly and carefully over the edge. I found the source of the gunshots. Three hunters were laughing and carrying on about fifty yards away. They were shooting the sky – sometimes killing a bird, mostly not – but retrieving nothing – feeding the scavengers of the earth with a gift from the human wastefulness.

Crawling back over the ridge I motioned for my friends to join me. I ran. They followed. I made sure we were far enough away from the hunters and then cut over the ridge in a full sprint. KABOOM! KABOM!

We made it to the road, and then followed the asphalt turns to the jeep, which sat fifty feet up on the ridge, in the middle of the thicket. The vehicle needed no push. Soon we were speeding down the mountain, listening to Jane’s Addiction and cheering our good fortune into the cool summer breeze.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

My Last Meal

I often envision slaughtering my next door neighbor

blood on my hands – no forgiveness

their final breath choked out and fizzling in my face

no more complaints

no more slamming against our shared wall

about the mid level music coming from the stereo

beside my ear

Guilty

I wouldn’t even ask for a trial

put me on death row

great novels have been written in prison

and historically I would be in good company

Now – what would my last meal be?

Heart of komodo dragon in a port reduction sauce?

They probably wouldn’t let me eat anything endangered.

I wouldn’t ask for no fried chicken though

I tell you what

Give me a Devon Crab and Maine Lobster salad

complete with truffle oil and a half tomato

stuffed with white Beluga caviar from Iran

A bottle of 1978 Montrachet

from Domaine de la Romanée-Conti

followed by

Wagyu beef seared for twenty seconds and served

with a broth of pure saffron, a side of smoked

Matsutake mushrooms and a salad of day old pea shoots

I would then ask for a Dansuke watermelon

And a Yubari melon – both from Japan

And then ten cups of Kopi Luwak

or civet coffee – coffee that has been eaten

digested and pooped by the civet

cleansing the bean of it’s acidic properties

for when they fill me full of juice

I want to be wired

I want to go out like I came in

screaming wild and covered in shit

release the bowels

release the ghost

turn out the lights

turn out the lights

back to the star shine

belly full of food and wine

indigestible

my last meal

fit for the worms

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Self as All

Contention with a witnessed spirit

bent on destruction and salvation

thought to be better blessed

or maybe just perfect timing

dancer in the unconscious solvent

a cancer to the obvious

breaking apart in the atmosphere

loosing tonnage like a meteorite

I was fourteen when I lost my virginity

and acted like a complete asshole afterwards

like a proud lion

roaring at the setting sun and sticking my bird chest out

I came nervous and fast and paid her little mind.

There was nothing special about my first time.

I don’t even remember her name.

I was the son of a motherfucker

punkrock pixie dust in my coat pocket

and traveling money I stole from my grandmother

along with pharmaceutical weapon

and sense of self divine

later entire homes and barns would burn

there has always been something about me and fire

the best devil to blow

Mandarin embers in the windy attic

a quick singe to the black earth

firetruck, firetruck arson man

never had a clue

never had a plan

just danced myself from womb to tomb

with T-Rex bloom and doom and soon

found myself at the center of the universe

playing a skipping record

I need to be knocked into

I was in a rut

I couldn’t stop talking about myself.

I was experiencing life for god.

I am god.

I am.

Amen.

There is mysticism appreciative of the gift

a link to the divine and to the self.

There is a key to enlightenment

that opens no doors

and a secret word that can not be spoken

but being free of schizophrenia

I confess no direct line

no words from the all mighty

save every word our of my mouth and yours.

Experience God in your every action.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Tourism Remembered

Hot tea steam

dragon licks

kiss of hibiscus

hit of marijuana

tickling the keyboard with reminiscent fingers

dreaming of Morocco

tangerine fragrance and five A.M. calls to prayer

sex in Africa

rooftop breakfast

a scorching orange sun in the October morning,

almonds and yogart,

two Spaniards who traveled with my wife and I

smiling,

also in love

cramped roads, old Bill Burroughs’s haunt, Café Central

this was Paul Bowles territory

a place of homosexual ghosts clinging to art and inheritance

coffee smells, cigarette smoke around every turn

a clutter of children selling hash, silk and paprika

in crimson djellaba and bright green dashiki

capped with bleach white kufis

little Sufis with fez cap and hula-hoop mysticism

The shops all closed down during the call to prayer

it was the first day of Ramadan

a strange time to be in a Muslim land

crossing the Mediterranean from Tarifa Spain

by high speed ferry

twenty five minutes from port to port

with incredible sea sickness and no time for scurvy

We weren’t pirates or drug smugglers,

but tourists

glimpsing into the brief window of their existence

A man sewed clothes in a 4x5ft room

stuffed with fabrics,

a chair for him to sit and a table for his machine

a lone bulb hung from a cord above his head

illuminating him with yellow green gravy

a specter of nicotine skin

qur’anic concentration

clean thoughts

he turned

his face a holy skull of infinite bliss

wisdom of the despaired

and turned back to his prayer of work

We drank with fat bellied developers in expensive suits

on hotel rooftops, poolside as the evening cooled

everyone spoke English and the talk was of rape and pillage

in the distance a McDonald’s sign

tattooed the mosque rich mountainside

a horrible red and yellow

flames of the corporate plague

that will gobble up every last consumer

We did not rock the Kasbah

but the ocean pounded inky black

on the strange midnight rocks

salty and secretive

rusting the old cannons

that waited for no new targets

We tip toed around the wondrous city

in search of no answer

only the air – the sweetness and the sourness

of the reality

as fifty sweaty men smoked over coffee

and stared silent at our wives when we passed

the testosterone box of fluorescent apes

in wild beard and sandy nails

a cheap and wonderful hotel room

a fast and accurate taxi ride

“We love America! We hate the George Bush;

but we love America!”

the young men yelled happily at us

as they tried to help us put our simple overnight bags

in the back of a taxi

for a quarter tip or dollar tip

whatever I do not know.

I hurried into the taxi, trusting no one.

We sped off for the ferry

and caught an afternoon boat back to Europe

the sea was calm and blue, as was the sky

we sat in the back of the boat and watched

North Africa

vanish.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Musty Inn


We waited in the car until Tim and Conner came out with the keys to our hotel room. We unloaded our travel bags from my car and unlocked the door to our room. As the lights came on, we could hear the millions of roaches and probably dozens of rodents scurry from the openness of the room to their respected hiding places.

Upon first glance of the room, I knew we were doomed. This was it. This was the end of our journey. We had found our resting place. This was exactly the side of the road motel featured in every horror movie about wayward travelers and blood thirsty axe-men. The room smelled of fear and anxiety, the nervous sweat of a lying convict, a trembling paranoid. The room stank of feet, armpits, bleach and ash, not just cigarette, but the noxious fumes of burnt plastic.

The motel had apparently opened in 1968. The pictures of Elvis Presley, soaring bald eagles and grizzly bears were all sun damaged and fading in their frames. The forest green and mellow-yellow shag carpeting was flat and matted down to the surface, worn in specific areas of the runway, between the bed and the bathroom, to the concrete beneath it; the padding long dissolved beneath the wayward boot-heel of the transient.

The beds were both sunken in and beaten to the spring. Two people would definitely have trouble sharing these beds.

I opted right away for the sleeping bag, taking my chances with the blood thirsty rats and the skin hungry roaches than face the disease and bedbug of the mattresses. The lamp shades had a decade worth of dust on them and made the room even dimmer, never mind the fading force of the fifteen watt bulbs therein. The faux wood paneling was chipping and scarred, full of holes, as if used for a knife throwing contest. The television was so old it had beveled glass, and a thick knob that only had thirteen numbers on it. It did not work.

I unrolled my sleeping bag beneath the table and the two chairs in the room, making a kind of fort; hoping that when the madman came in, in the middle of the night and blasted the occupants away with his sawed-off shotgun that he would somehow mistake my form for some kind of chrysalis; cocooning peacefully in the mildew and must of the room; not human at all, just some giant winged insect about to take flight and cause some sort of chaos in my own right. I figured if he thought I was some sort of future Godzilla-battling Mothra then he would leave me alone, as he had come to only slaughter humans.

The bathroom was moist with bacteria. I was sure that all forms of microbiological entities were growing in the mildew and fungus of the green stained shower, toilet bowl and sink. There was a soaking wet towel on the floor as if a lonely trucker had come here to shower, masturbate and sleep for a few more hours until he had to hit the road, and roar on across the country, high on speed, and pushing to meet his payload. I looked underneath the sink for a fresh towel. There were two. One was stained with blood, deep red and light brown, the other stank of human feces. I chose the blood soaked one, took a hot thirty second shower and went to my bag.

“Hey Mikey!” I heard Tim yell.

“What’s that?”

“We’re sharing towels.”

I walked over to the bathroom where Tim had so quickly taken over after my quick and dexterous first place finish to the shower. I took off the towel I was wearing and handed it to him. I turned and paraded my svelte form and low hanging balls to the rest of the room. Johnny and Claudette hooted and hollered. Conner pretended not to notice.

I put on fresh underwear, which I realized I hadn’t done in a week, and curled up in my bag for sleep and dream and possible gun blast.

Claudette sketched while the boys took their turns showering and drying off; Johnny and Conner cursing Tim and I for taking the only non-stinky towel. Claudette had her own it seemed.

“Hell! Ours is covered in blood!” I heard Tim say.

“So; at least it doesn’t stink!” Conner yelled.

Finally the lights were out and I listened while Claudette and Conner snuggled and made out, enjoying the taco shaped bed, and Johnny and Tim fidgeted in theirs. Finally Johnny came over to where I was, carrying with him a comforter that smelled like squished maggots. He rolled the comforter up at one end until it was a pillow and he lay down close to me beneath my table fort.

The dreams were flickering their tongues of flames about my icy consciousness, attempting to merge with my reality when the noises came. BAM! BAM! BOOM!

Screaming issued from the bottom of some female form in the distance. Thunder clapped the lightning strike. More banging of mysterious sounds. Was the murderous madman I had envisioned, sent from Hell to drag me back to my spawned doom?

“Is that a gun?” Johnny asked.

“Hey Mikey should we go investigate?” Tim was up and at ‘em.

Claudette turned on the lights.

“Fuck it man let’s just try to get some sleep.” Conner suggested.

Tim differed; “I want to know what the fuck it is. If it is gunfire, then we should call the police.” He probably thought he could unarm the assailant and become a hero in Nowhere Saskatchewan, accepting the key to the hick city and having his choice of every eighteen year old girl in town.

My common sense spoke up; “If those noises are gunshots, then we would certainly be defying our safety by opening the door.” I wanted to sleep and dream, not have this conversation, not be aware of whatever horror was happening on the other side of that door.

Tim had already jumped out of bed and dressed. I got out of my bag begrudgingly, because one has to have their brother’s back, and because I would never hear the end of it from him if I didn’t. ‘I could’ve died out there’, he most certainly would have said.

“Let’s just open the door a little bit” he said. Tim then got onto his stomach and raised himself only tall enough to manipulate the door lock and knob.

The doorknob slowly turned. The door slowly opened to the inside. Nothing. We could see nothing. Tim stood up a bit, keeping the door only cracked a touch, a hair, a smidgen, only enough for us to peek. He continued to rise; now standing beside me, in front of me, wanting to be the Shaolin master to catch the bullet between his teeth; wanting to be the man of steel and have all weapons be useless against his impenetrable costume.

Finally, after a few peeks and quiet guesses, Tim, Johnny and I were outside looking around the premises for any danger that we might be able to thwart with our magnificent abilities.

Nothing. We could see or hear nothing.

Finally: BAM!

Johnny and I each made a quick leap back in the direction of our safe hotel room. Tim didn’t move, didn’t flinch. That meant Johnny and I had to stand our ground. We both knew it; knew it like every teenage man knows it when he must choose to die with his brother than flee the scene and leave him unattended, unprotected, not gotten, not backed up. Testosterone driven boys have no other recourse: It’s kill or be killed.

BAM! BOOM!

We all three stood our grounds and wondered where the sound was coming from. Suddenly we heard the scream again though this time it sounded a lot more festive than fearful. Then the car: The old 1975 Firebird came rolling around the corner with two women in tube tops pouring from the roof window and screaming in the rain. The car was driven by a young imbecile and was backfiring in the night.

It was pouring rain and the car was being flooded. They were on tremendous amounts of some type of lethal drug I assumed and felt satisfied that it was not some maniac drill sergeant recently AWOL and in search of free birds, traveling kids and drug users to slaughter with horrible weapon.

All of our dreams of local news stardom were shot down. We were actually disappointed. We wanted to save the day, swoop upon the perilous horror like Mighty Mouse and save the damsel in distress, untie her from the railroad tracks, seconds before the locomotive flattens her, therefore embracing her undying love. “Sorry ma’am, there are many towns, many damsels in distress. We must be off to another town to fight for the good of mankind.” And then we would vanish.

Inside Conner and Claudette were asleep in each other’s arms, unconcerned by the commotion going on outside or the Robin Hood / Peter Pan never-ever-land activities of the boys in flight to save the day. Tim was amped. He wanted to take a dip and talk with me outside. I smoked a cigarette and listened. He was my brother. I would’ve done anything he asked. That’s what trust earns you. I knew, and know, that he would never ask me to do anything that wasn’t worth doing, even if it cost my life.

The sunrise was beautiful and the drive out of town couldn’t come quick enough. The heat came on us in an instant. The sun hurdled itself across the sky in search of wax wings to melt, flower petals to open, water to evaporate, skin to burn.

Saskatchewan looked worse in the day time. It was all Nebraska and Kansas, flat farmlands and uneventful towns. We drove and we drove and nothing happened; until; suddenly the mosquitoes came. I have never seen so many of one type of living thing ever. A cumulous cloud of billions and billions of mosquitoes engulfed our vehicles. I lost Tim completely. He was on his own I figured. We would just have to meet at the job sight. I couldn’t see. Nothingness. I slowed down to thirty miles an hour. I didn’t want to get hit from behind either.

Again, I thought the end was nigh. I was certain that an out of control big rig would split us in half; unable to see our slow progress in the storm of insects we were being attacked by. The windshield wipers only made it worse, the bug guts and blood streaked across the glass in yellow, brown and red smears. I slowed to twenty miles an hour and just plodded along, hopping not to get hit, hopping not to hit anything. I had no idea of Tim’s truck’s speed, perhaps they had better windshield cleaner than I and were making terrific time, perhaps it was worse and I was sure to rear-end them at any moment.

The mosquitoes began coming in through the vent. There were ten or twenty of the little fuckers inside. Johnny and Claude armed themselves with rolled up newspaper sections and went to town attacking the bloodsucking little vermin. SPLAT! SWAT! SMASH! THANK! PAM! BOOF! They were the frontline in my defense as I drove and dreaded Yellow Fever, Malaria or any form of toxic viral matter transferred from some sick fuck to me.

Sting! Bite! MMM! I could feel the nanovampires getting at me, sticking there hypodermic snouts through my tissue and sucking my plasma into their bellies. I could feel myself feeding the little monsters; the welts swelling on my youthful skin as I smacked and batted my legs and arms and neck while driving.

And just like that (A snap of fingers) they dissipated. As fast as they were there they were gone. Tim was up ahead a ways, but thanks to the flat landscape I could tell that he was not far.

I sped ahead and squirted the last of my windshield wiper cleaning fluid on to the glass and created a toxic yellow smear to barely see through. I dared to open my window and wiped a line of insect guts with the meat from the pinky side of my left hand.

We pulled off at the next gas station and washed our vehicles, hoping not to see another mosquito for the rest of our lives. We all pissed, got coffee and tobacco and hit the road again immediately. No time for lollygagging we had a crane and a truck to meet. The rest of the drive was flat and uneventful. I put on Paranoid by Black Sabbath and we prepared for the next city, the next carnival, new faces, old faces, a routine, an unfamiliar surrounding, the whole journey congealing into a common motion. Commotion is better than boredom.